This past weekend I had the pleasure of my sister’s company. She flew in from NS to spend the weekend with us and together we went to visit our brother whom we haven’t seen or spoken to in a while. We have had disagreements over the years that made communication awkward and uncomfortable. The reason for our visit I’ll keep to myself for now but I’m happy to say it was a good visit and I’m hopeful it is the beginning of a renewed relationship between us all.
Family relations can be difficult. Often disagreements lead to hurt feelings, anger, frustration and misunderstandings. Just because you are related to someone does not mean you agree with choices they make, how they treat others or how they live their life. Estrangement from my brother did not sit well with me. I’m a fixer. I want everything to be happy and smooth. I don’t like arguments or confrontations. I thought that if I couldn’t change my brother to the way I think then a relationship with him wasn’t possible. After this weekend though my opinions on that have changed.
I know that my brother’s choices or relationships with others in my family have nothing to do with me. While I may disagree, it is not my job or duty to try to change that or fix it. That is his responsibility only. I can still enjoy his company and be there for him when he needs me and keep that separate from the relations he has with any one else. I can hope but I can’t force something that isn’t there.
I love my brother unconditionally. He is not perfect but then neither am I. At the end of the day, he is my little brother and I want him in my life. I want to share stories. I want him to see my daughter grow up and mature. I want to see him laugh at my husband’s jokes. I want to enjoy the pleasure of his girlfriend’s company and her delicious cooking. I want to share meals and holiday celebrations. I want to hug him when he is sad or in pain. Friends come and go but family should be the one thing that stays constant.
Be Pretty, Plus and Proud and like me, I hope you realize and appreciate the love and support of family! I hope you are part of a family that is open to listening, loving and supporting!