Are Your Wheels Spinning?

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Do you ever feel stuck, like your wheels are spinning and you just can’t get going? Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you work to please someone, it just never seems to be enough? Do you feel like you are just never good enough; sympathetic enough, helpful enough, kind enough, supportive enough?

I think many of us try to be an emotional source of support for those we love, but sometimes it may seem you can’t win for trying as the saying goes. I think it’s safe to say we are generally aware of and understand all too well the stress and strain other people are under. That seems to be the main point of discontent between people; one always understands better than the other. Often our own issues seem pale in comparison but can one person’s pain ever be compared to another’s? Can we judge other people’s problems as less trivial than our own. We all have burdens to bear and while some of those burdens may seem less heavy to the beholder, they may not be seen or felt the same by the person bearing the weight.

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Is it wrong to think of yourself and forget to think of others? Is it wrong to get caught up in life and forget to ask questions, show concern for others? Does it make you a bad person? A selfish person? A thoughtless person? An insensitive person? My hope is the answer is no. I am guilty of all of the above but I’m pretty sure it all happens to the best of us at one time or another. Should we be made to feel unworthy because of those actions? Or should we be understood and forgiven? Should we cast stones? I think we should not be judge and jury but be lenient with trespasses as we are not perfect, no one is.

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Relationships require give and take. They require love and understanding. They require patience. Good relationships, the ones that will last a lifetime, will not be based on criticism or unfair judgement. Believe that people are doing their best when they say so. If they are not giving you what you feel you need or deserve, ask them why. Don’t jump to the conclusion that they don’t care. Be mindful of what stresses they might be harbouring. Work together. Be careful of what you say especially in the heat of anger or when emotions are running high. Be respectful and most of all be kind.

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All images courtesy of thebutterflyblingg on Instagram. 

 

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Set Your Boundaries

You are the master of your own body and your life. You have to set the rules for how you wish to be treated. If you allow people to take advantage of your kindness, they will continue to do so. If you allow people to bully you and mistreat you, they will continue to do so. If you have low expectations for your success, you will not achieve any of your goals. If people see you don’t care about yourself, why should they care about you? If people are always asking things of you but never or rarely giving back in return and you continue to allow that behaviour to be the norm, it will never change.

You must set boundaries. You must teach people what is acceptable behaviour when they are around you. Allow only positivity and light into your space. Reinforce the truth that you are worthy of love and respect. Stop anyone or anything that does not bring you happiness and peace.

Be Pretty, Plus and Proud of who you are, in this moment. Believe, despite what others may say or do, that you are doing your best to be the best person you can be and that you are more than capable of living an amazing life. Others may doubt your strength. Others may scoff at your passions, think them unimportant but you know the difference. You know the truth. Stand firm in the face of adversity. Be careful of what and who you allow in your life. Stop whatever and whoever is a negative and dark force. Search for and reinforce who and what brings you joy.

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Image courtesy of thebutterflyblingg on Instagram.

Express Yourself!

How do you express yourself? How do you tell people who you are and what you are all about? Everyone has talents, things they enjoy that tell the world who they are as people.

I consider myself a creative person. As a teacher I always enjoyed creating a classroom that was colourful, warm and inviting. I wanted to create a space that was motivating to my students and a space they looked forward to spending their day in. Now, I express myself in other ways. I like to create an inviting home space. I express thoughts, opinions and feelings through my writing. I enjoy playing with fashion. People can tell I’m a little bit saucy and a little bit sweet depending on whether I choose to wear my skulls or my flowers in my outfit. People can tell I like to keep up with the latest trends as is evident in my choice of hairstyle and makeup. I think the choices I make and the things I like to do show I am a confident woman in my own skin. I know I am loved and free to be who I truly am, not letting anyone or anything say I’m not good enough or worthy because of my size or shape.

So what do you do to express who you are? Do you paint, draw, cook, sing, play an instrument, dance or dive? Do you contribute forward thinking ideas at work? Are you daring, trying the scariest rides at the fair? Do you make beautiful quilts, knit or do needlepoint? Do you garden? Climb mountains? Travel the world? What activities or talents do you enjoy that tell people who you are?

Don’t hide or be afraid to do the things you love or try new things! Be Pretty, Plus and Proud and express yourself in a way that shows you at your best. The world deserves to know what an amazing person you are and you deserve the accolades for the wonderful things you contribute to make the world a more colourful and interesting place to be!

Be Humble and Kind

If you are a country music fan you may recognize these lyrics from a song by Tim McGraw. I think it’s an important message we could all use as a reminder of how we should conduct ourselves in this world. There is too much hate, intolerance and selfishness.  Too many people think only of themselves and how they can be one step ahead of their neighbours. Too many people think of owning possessions that are shinier or better than everyone else’s. We get caught up in our own little world, stepping over people or putting others down so we can move farther forward.

Instead, we should be thinking of how we can help others move forward. How can we put a smile on someone’s face today? If you have riches beyond what you need, share what you have. As the saying goes, “Live simply so others may simply live”. Be grateful for the blessings in your life. Don’t brag or boast, be humble. Build people up so they too may enjoy a life like yours. Be kind.

If you live a life with these thoughts, you will have a life filled with joy and self-satisfaction. You can look at yourself in a mirror and see someone to Be Pretty, Plus and Proud of. When you think of others and put yourself in a position of service for your fellow human beings, you will feel good about the person you are. That’s what is most important as you live out your days. How you look is of little significance when you are ‘Humble and Kind”.

I Love My Work In Progress!

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Image courtesy of c71ls on Instagram. 

It doesn’t matter what size or shape you are, you are still worthy of love and respect both from yourself and others. No one body is ever perfect. Slim people, fat people, tall people, short people, we are all people with room for improvement.

Sometimes we need to improve our physical health. We could all use a little more activity and better nourishment for our bodies. Does that mean we have to go on a diet and become obsessed with calories, points or measuring our food? No, it simply means to practice mindful eating. Become aware of how certain foods make you feel. Experience the explosion of tastes on your tongue. Feel the food making your body strong. Don’t deny your body of treats, that’s where dieting begins and mindful eating stops. Move your body and be aware of how that feels. Does it give you energy so you can better enjoy life? Does it enable you to be more flexible or stronger? Exercise for the joy of movement and what that does to help you live your best life.

Sometimes we need to improve our emotional or mental health. How can you do that? Read self-help books that inspire you. Follow people on social media that motivate you. Seek professional help if your issues are more than you can handle on your own. Asking for help is a sign of courage and strength not weakness.

Maybe our inner morals and values need to be more of a focus. Spend time volunteering in your community in a way that has a positive impact on people in need.

Wherever you need change, it’s worth pursuing. The need for change and improvement doesn’t mean you should hate yourself or who you are. You can still love your work in progress while you strive for improvement or make room for change.

Be Pretty, Plus and Proud of the body you live in. It’s beautiful now as it is and while under construction!

No Regrets, Just What Ifs…

I’ve had to make many decisions in my life that certainly weren’t easy. Like most of you, my life has had its fair share of ups and downs; points in life where one choice leads you down a road leaving you wonder where the other road would have taken you.

Twenty seven years ago I chose to leave home and move thousands of miles away to pursue my dream of being a teacher. That choice was made with the intent of eventually making my way back home after I had some teaching experience under my belt. As so often happens, things didn’t quite go as I planned. I ended up meeting a wonderful man who became my husband. This December we will celebrate twenty years of marriage. Shortly before meeting him, I was diagnosed with MS. I told Rob about my disease early in our relationship and that guy didn’t even bat an eye. He accepted that part of me the same as all my other “flaws”. He has been my rock; taking care of me, supporting me, laughing with me, holding me up, giving me strength and been my best friend through thick and thin. He’s not perfect and not everyone’s cup of tea but that doesn’t matter. He’s perfect for me and he’s my perfect cup of tea.

I miss NS. I miss my family. I am sorry when I can’t be there in times of turmoil, struggle or despair. I am sad when I miss out on important family celebrations. I made the decision to leave and while I have no regrets about that decision I have questions. What if I had stayed? Would I ever have met someone as right for me as Rob? I think not. Would I have the same beautiful daughter that I am so very proud of? I think not. Would the other road have led me to the wonderful friends and extend family I am now blessed to have? I think not. Would I have experienced the same adventures? Probably not.

I have no regrets but sometimes I wonder, what if? What if I had made the decision to stay? What would life had been like? Do you ever wonder where different decisions or choices may have led you; what different journeys you may have had if you took the other path in the fork of road of life? It’s interesting to imagine but don’t dwell on the past too long. Be happy in the present, with the choices you made to get here. Those choices and decisions have made you into the amazing person you are today.

Be Pretty, Plus and Proud and live a life free of regret. Be happy with the life you have built for yourself and continue the journey you have planned.

Fashion Friday – Torrid Haul!

I have been doing a thorough cleaning out of my closet and selling unwanted items on VarageSale. Check out this website for your local area for great deals on clothing, household items, storage possibilities and so much more.

So with my sale money in hand, I went to my favourite shopping destination: Torrid! I wanted to add a few new sweater styles to my fall/winter wardrobe. If you read my winter wish list post a few days ago, you’ll recognize a couple of items. Sadly some items were already sold out at my local store. Heading into the big city with my cousin in a couple of weeks so we’ll see about some of the items I couldn’t find here. Happy to say, I have hooked someone else onto the wonders of Torrid. You’re welcome Torrid!

Anyway, check out my purchases below. See any you might like for yourself or already have? Let me know! Don’t forget Torrid always has some kind of promotion going on. BOGO 1/2 price on regular priced items. Clearance right now is BOG two free. Check online too as deals may be different from the store. Shipping to Canada is a straight $20, maybe 1/2 that if you are a platinum member.

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Jewellery items all from clearance BOG two free!

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Camouflage jeans were clearance (gifted to me by my cousin with whom I was shopping). Sweater is regular price which was BOGO 1/2 price. Pants are a size 18 (a bit loose but that was the only pair left so I’ll make them work), sweater is size 1.

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This sweater is super soft and I love the fading detail and keyhole cutout at the neck. Sweater is size 2, part of the BOGO 1/2 price.

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This is another super soft and cozy sweater. I love the grommet detail in the word “Love”. This sweater is also a size 2 and part of the BOGO 1/2 price deal. 

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This is a cute top with satin in the front and t-shirt material in the back. This will look great with my camouflage pants pictured above. I got this in a size 0 as it is very loose-fitting. This was also part of the BOGO 1/2 deal. 

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This is a gorgeous top! I love the rose detail! This is a size one as the top is very loose-fitting. Also part of the BOGO 1/2 price promotion. 

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This poncho is the softest and coziest thing I’ll be wearing this season! It’s gorgeous! This is one size fits all so very loose fit. Again this was part of the BOGO 1/2 price deal. 

So that’s my Torrid fashion haul for now. I have to sell a few more items to restock my wallet for the next shopping trip!

Be Pretty, Plus and Proud in this season’s coziest, cold weather styles!